As a public service to those who haven't followed their daily O.J. trial updates we prepare them now for the final verdict and list the . . .
by Sally Dolon
10 Fox wants Juice to play lead in Othello remake. Marcia Clark makes deal to get Desdemona part.
9 In Cinderella finish O.J. tries on the bloody glove, but it does not fit! (stolen from old Matlock script)
8 Jury is confused why Kato Kaelin lived at O.J.'s house. Too bad they missed Nightline episode which explained it all.
7 L.A.P.D. credibility is destroyed. Stories prove cops sometimes curse, use racial slurs, exceed speed limits,
and most shocking of all: shoot guns!
6 Jury watches old Simpson movies proving O.J. can not act or lie convincingly.
5 The trial is in Los Angeles-- even the jury is from L.A.
4 NFL Oddsmakers say it's 1000 to 1 against conviction. Key Stat: No back has ever run for 1,000 yards AND later been convicted of more than cocaine.
3 Rodney King believes O.J. is innocent.
2 California courts always acquit once defendant spends over $10 million on lawyers.
and the number one reason O.J. will walk ...
1 White People want an excuse to riot too.